Peaks and Pits

On working the overnight shift:

Pits

1. The obvious - unless you hate sunlight, working overnight is not ideal for anyone

2. Leaving my warm bed at 10 pm and venturing into the cold night

3. Struggling at maintaining any sort of routine

4. Sleeping during beautiful days

5. I find myself really, really tired, a lot of the time

Peaks

1. I appreciate the daytime SO much more

2. Errands and shopping are way less painful - no hassle or crowds

3. No traffic on the drive to and from work... ever!

4. I have an excuse to stay in my pj's ALL day

5. I so look forward to the time I do get to spend with Felix

*6. I love the other overnight staff

Merry Christmas

Wishing everyone a MERRY MERRY Christmas.

[Frohe Weihnachten]

Date Mornings

Between my work schedule and Felix's classes, we aren't left with tons of free nights when I'm not exhausted or when we don't have other things to get done. Like I said before, this situation has caused us to be much more creative when planning our weekly dates. 'Date Night'  can be a very flexible term, and as long as we set aside a specific block of time to do something out of our normal routine, I call that successful. A few weeks ago, we scheduled a date morning, in which I was in charge of food and Felix was in charge of the activity. I tried my hand at a version of this breakfast pizza I found online. I wasn't prepared and didn't have all of the ingredients - I replaced sausage with turkey bacon, and I used salsa as the pizza sauce - and it certainly didn't look pretty, but it turned out okay!

Inspired by our fun night out at Canvas and Cocktails in Cherry Creek last month, Felix brought home a couple of blank canvases and tons of paint supplies. We enjoyed breakfast while pretending to be artistic which was a great way to start the day.

Today, we slept in until 9 (amazing!) and tried out a new breakfast place in Capitol Hill. I was recommended a few fun places in that area by a friend who lives there and I am determined to try ALL of them. Jelly's yummy food paired with the adorable diner atmosphere made for a very pleasant morning. They make homemade jelly, fresh every morning and it's a different flavor every day. We were impressed with our meals and if we weren't stuffed enough, we topped the meal off with their famous donut holes filled with house jelly, creamy custard, chocolate, and cinnamon sugar. They were out of this world delicious. The kind of thing you can make room for at the end of any meal. I am excited to go back, maybe for brunch with friends, and enjoy their specialty mimosas!

Bellingham, WA

A few weeks ago, I went to visit my younger (bigger) brother in Bellingham, WA. With the exception of the 2 full days spent traveling (flight to Seattle then 2.5 hour bus ride to Bellingham), it was a wonderful few days and I am so happy I made the trip.



  

Since I went during his week (my weekend), he had classes to go to so I spent some alone time, enjoying the killer view from his studio apartment, cleaning and wandering/getting lost in the town.

I grocery shopped for him and made him and his friends chili and tested out these s'more cookies. 

If you ever get the chance to visit WA, in addition to spending time in Seattle, I highly recommend visiting Bellingham. It is a picturesque pacific northwest town. While fall is usually full of rainy days, my few days were gorgeous - warm and sunny!

He graciously decided to skip all of his classes one day and we spent the afternoon wandering through Fairhaven, a small affluent suburb located on the edge of Bellingham Bay, full of high-end boutiques and stellar restaurants. After some fish and chips that rivaled even those we ate in Australia, we took a nap and finished deep cleaning his whole apartment. It was the first time his bathroom floor had seen a mop - what wonderful sisterly influence I have.

On my last night, Christopher, his girlfriend and I went to a wonderful seafood dinner overlooking the water and completed the night watching Toy Story 3. I left early the next morning and got home just in time to head to work at 10:30 pm.

I am so proud of him and it was great to get a glimpse of the life he's made for himself out there. He graduates in 6 short months. I am so excited to see what is next for him, and I have no doubt I will continue to be proud.

I love you baby brother!

Welcome December

Yesterday was outrageously beautiful and sunny (Felix went to lunch in shorts and flip-flops!). It was a perfect ending to a glorious November. 

This morning, we woke up in our toasty warm bed and excitedly pulled open the curtains to reveal a snow covered ground. We watched in silence as the thick flakes continued to fall and stick to the already 4 inch layer of fluff. So we say, WELCOME DECEMBER! We are excited for what this month is bringing; lots of family and presents and more snow, just to name a few.

Our back porch

Short of anxiously watching the names of schools scroll across the bottom of the TV screen during the news in anticipation of a SNOW DAY, we treated today much like I used to on snow days back when I was in high school. Super lazy morning which blended into an afternoon of PJ's and hot chocolate.

I'm not like most people where I start anticipating Christmas as soon as (or maybe a little before) Thanksgiving is over. I don't believe in decorating, listening to Christmas tunes, or even lighting my favorite cinnamon spice candles any earlier than December 1. But now that it's December.. bring on the Christmas decorations and everything that comes with it!

Sir Toby, my parent's cat, posing by the new tree

Happy happy December! 

Birthday Blues?

Birthdays, in my opinion, are overrated and over anticipated. I have always grouped them in with New Year's Eve - one of those holidays that no matter how hard you try and plan or how excited you get, it never goes as well as you want it to. Maybe because these 'holidays' are always (even if you don't try to) so built up in our minds, that we set them up to be failures. I have always been a fan of spreading birthday celebrations over the span of a whole week. That way you aren't putting all of your hope for a perfect celebration into a 12-hour slot.

That may seem very negative on my part, but I can vividly remember a few really bad birthdays from high school and college that resulted in tears and disappointment. But this year was an absolute exception. The day did, however, begin in tears after a rough morning at work: countless attempts at discipline and a group of extremely defiant teenagers. But after a brief cry on the phone to Felix in the car, my birthday got significantly better as the day went on.

I came home to a clean apartment and a slice of my favorite chocolate cake. One of my best friends picked me up for an early lunch, hands full with beautiful orange roses and a cake, complete with 24 candles!

My birthday afternoon consisted of cuddles, a movie, and a nap on the couch - ideal after a night at work. We woke up on time for a delicious dinner at the Melting Pot in downtown Littleton. This was a go-to birthday spot back in the day so it was nostalgic and brought back wonderful memories.

Birthday festivities continued throughout the week with gifts from amazing friends from the other side of the country, salsa lessons, and seeing the Lion King show downtown.

Honestly, the past few weeks, I've had angst about getting 'older.' 24 seemed really old. I remember turning 18 and 19 and feeling like mid-20's were so far away. But time goes by fast, and I imagine it only gets faster. But 24 is great. I'd like to think I'm one year wiser and more mature, but I'm definitely one year more appreciative for all the fabulous people in my life.

Happy weekend!

3 Smiles

Sometimes, there are really big exciting things that I want to share, and really small, seemingly unimportant things that are equally as exciting to me. Either way, they help keep me going and make my weeks happy!

One of my best friends from college booked her ticket to come visit me!!

My new Mac

Homemade cookie and cream sandwiches

My First {real} Job!

With the exception of a few internships and 6 month working stints, I have never had a job. Devoting most of my youth to volleyball left very little room for any other type of work. So you can see why coming back from Uganda with NO idea what I was going to be doing was incredibly terrifying. I had successfully avoided intense interviews, cover letters, and job searching for 23 years and I was going to be forced headfirst into the job hunt upon my return.

I was lucky to find a position - that I LOVE - fairly quickly. And so far, it has been everything I expected a first job to be. Granted it is not the typical 9-5 work day, I am slowly adjusting to the graveyard shift hours, and re-learning what it means to be held accountable to other people.

The only other experience I can really compare it to is volleyball in college. And the working world is oddly similar. (Hmm, is this what coaches always meant by teaching us 'real life skills?') - Long hours, plenty of overtime, lots of laughs with co-workers, bitching (sometimes to fit in) about bosses and other coworkers, getting paid, and sometime questioning why on earth I'm doing what I'm doing.

The nature of my work is really challenging. All of the kids we work with have been through intense stuff. Most of them have been in the court system for years and we may be just another temporary home for them. Many are suicidal, abused/abusive, angry, depressed... I get an interesting outlook while working at night. I monitor the kids while they are sleeping and have to deal with waking them up and getting them ready for the day.  I find myself at times fighting tears as I pop in to check on them every 15 minutes. Because at that point, while they are sound asleep, I don't see them for their drug use, their tempers, or their sexual abuse. I see them for the young teenagers that they are. The 12, 13, 14 year olds that have been put in situations that have stripped them of their innocence, ability to let people in, and capability of seeing past tomorrow.

Since I've never worked (or studied) in social services, the learning curve has been incredibly high for me. Since I've started, I've done a med-training course, CPR/first aid certification, Hippa training, and had meetings with our therapists to learn about our methods of treatment for the kids.

During first aid, while learning how to apply ointment and properly apply a band-aid, I thought about some of the wounds I treated in Uganda - the 2 year old with the third degree burns down her arm, the man with the foot fungus, or the little boy with the hole in his arm from a witchcraft ceremony. I couldn't help but feel more than qualified for the first-aid I'll be dealing with at work. Bring it on paper cuts.

Due to the mass amount of new information, I am constantly taking notes on my hand or on scraps of paper of frequently used terms and acronyms that I don't know the meanings of. I then, subsequently, spend hours reading online trying to learn as much as I can.

The hours have been less of an adjustment than I thought. I'm finding that my body needs less sleep, but I also sleep my entire 'weekend' (Monday-Wednesday). My work schedule has definitely forced even more creativity into our relationship, whether that means scheduling 'Date Night' on a Saturday morning or planning weeks in advance for an overnight trip. Having a job makes the weeks go by really fast, and because I love what I am doing, helps me look forward to the work week starting again, which I am incredibly grateful for!

Just Write

There's one thing I've learned abut myself, especially in the last year: I love to write. It doesn't matter the subject or the facet in which I'm writing, but I always enjoyed knocking out a good paper in college, keeping up with journals, and writing endless amounts of "to-do" lists. But since I've been back from Uganda, I've been seriously struggling with my writing and I'm not sure why. The whole "holding myself accountable to my blog" thing didn't work. It seemed to create more writer's block for me because since then, I haven't felt that anything I do or think of is worthy of writing about. 

I've been reading all sorts of blogs lately about food, travel, fashion, charities, etc. I am constantly inspired and overwhelmingly intimidated by so many bloggers, not only because they are all tremendous writers, but because I know how difficult it is to put yourself out there like that. I am so convinced that writing (especially in a public forum) is one of the most raw and vulnerable forms of self-expression. Not to mention that by writing on a public blog, you have to convince yourself that people may in fact care about what you have to say (And I'm definitely not there yet!)

Although my initial plan was for no one to be reading this, my type A personality (thanks, Dad) doesn't allow me to post anything I don't feel is worthy. And my definition of worthy is at times too high to meet. 

So I have a new plan... Relax and just write.

Whether that ends up being my stream of consciousness, attempts in the kitchen, peak/pit experiences in my own life, or just pictures I want to "share," I just hope I can be somehow relate-able to someone out there.

Life for us has been great lately. I forgot how pleasant Denver is in the Fall and I was falling in love with the leaves constantly.

We enjoyed a quiet Halloween weekend - no dressing up but we did carve pumpkins!

And we welcomed our first huge snow with open arms... and a broken heater. Fortunately, my parents (and conveniently, landlords) live a few blocks away and they don't mind letting us stay with them for a few days every now and then. 

Until soon, we send love from Denver!

Living a Good Story

It’s been a long month and a half since the morning I sat in the Entebbe airport writing my last blog post, with no clue what the next chunk of my life was going to be like. I was processing the last 4 months and was overwhelmed, to say the least. I was anxious [although excited] about all the question marks in my future and honestly worried about my re-immersion. Uganda is still on my heart every minute of every day. I am doing what I can to use what I've learned here in my own community. I am already excited for the day I get to return to a place I called home.

Before I left Uganda, one of my best friends Cody asked me if I was going to continue my blog once I got home. My immediate answer was of course not – I won’t have anything to blog about. After a little more chatting with him and a lot more thinking with myself, I realized how sad that actually is. Shouldn’t we all have something to write about, even if only every few weeks? Shouldn’t everyone be living blog-worthy lives??

I was [and still very much am] on a Donald Miller HIGH. (If you haven’t read his books, then read them!) 

One of his books, “A Million Miles in A Thousand Years,” introduces this idea of living a good story. He talks about making choices because they will create good memories and how you will look back and be glad you made those decisions later.

Continuing my blog is my way of holding myself accountable to living a good story. I don’t care if anyone else reads it – because it is for me. So we’ll see how good I am about keeping it updated.

My journey HOME began with a few days in Dubai. It’s difficult to explain what it was like going from extreme poverty to a city of air-conditioned bus stops, 32nd floor luxury apartments, diamond-rimmed cars, malls and indoor ski resorts. But it was surreal. It was too surreal to even feel the affects of reverse culture shock. Nothing felt real since it was so insanely different from what I was used to. I missed the comforts that became so familiar to me in Uganda. Nic and Tim were wonderful tour guides and hosts and we had a great 3 days. We sight saw, swam, go-karted, and frequented many different malls. I am super grateful I was able to visit such an exquisite city. 

Next was London, which was incredible and surprisingly refreshing after being in Dubai. The best part was meeting my dad and spilling everything to him about how I was feeling. London is a “rich” city. So much amazing history and background, we barely skimmed the surface in our quick 3 days. It’s definitely a city I can imagine going back to for a longer period of time.

By the time I got back to Denver, I was already re-immersed into ‘wealth and normalcy,’ it was actually a relief to come home to the bland city, full of average-ness, hippies, and Toyota Prius’s. I went into hiding my first few days back. I had some necessary rest and recovery with my mom, and slowly started to venture into real life, catching up with friends, and beginning the tedious task of networking and job searching.

So over the last few weeks, I spent a lot of time with family, started getting our apartment unpacked and organized. My mom adopted a 7-year old, white, 3-legged cat. His name is Sir Toby and he is a sweet addition to the family.

I’ve really been enjoying the things I missed over the summer – the close-to-perfect Colorado weather, cooking dinner for Felix, sitting on our front porch. We're entering the incredible [but quick] fall season here, and it is beautiful. We're enjoying 75 degree days, bike rides, and eating outside. If this season is anything like they usually are, we should have snow in the next few weeks.

By far the best day this month was the day I picked Felix up from the airport. 4 ½ months was a long time to be apart, but we didn’t miss a beat. Being back home with him has been so great.

Without going into too much detail about my mini job search, I met with a few organizations/non-profits and I wasn’t blown away. Being the impatient, want-a-solution-NOW kind of girl, I began to get a little discouraged and worried about my plans. In the next few days, I was referred to a home in Lakewood, CO to work with at-risk teens. There was a part time position available and I thought it could work for a short time while I continued searching for full-time work. The second I walked in the door, I knew it would be a good fit.

That morning, a full-time, overnight position became available. After the interview, I accepted a position as a Youth Treatment Counselor at Gemini House, a residential home for at-risk, court-ordered, and runaway teens. Gemini was perfect for me for may reasons – but mostly, there are no bells and whistles. They are an interim home for troubled teens, doing what they can to keep them safe and prepare them for life after Gemini. There’s nothing fancy about it. It’s not always the most pleasant place to be, but it’s full of love. And if there’s anything I learned in Uganda, is most of the time, all someone needs is a little love.

As I sit here writing this at 5 am, my overnight shift is almost over. It’s been a fairly uneventful night (which is a great thing!), and I can once again say that I feel very much where I am supposed to be.

I’m learning how non-profits are run and seeing a unique side of the business and of the kids while working overnight. A got a reminder recently from someone who’s opinion means a lot to me. He reminded me of a blog post I wrote towards the beginning of summer: IT IS ALL WORTH IT. And it’s true. I know I will be glad I did this down the road. This is invaluable experience that I am in the perfect place in my life to be getting right now. Life really is just a sequence of decisions we make. Some may not seem right at the time, some may feel rushed, and other may feel perfect. But the second we become scared to make these decisions is when we stop living good stories.  I’m already living a story, now I’m just trying my best to keep mine good.

Happy Thursday!

Love Hard

My last week was better than I could have ever planned. Cody and I visited Nurse Gladys's home town. We met her jaja (grandma), aunt, uncle, and cousins. It was cool seeing where she grew up and getting to know some of her family members. On Sunday, I went with my runner friend Joseph to visit his home village. I knew bits and pieces of his story but was able to hear the whole thing from his 111 year old jaja. She found him in 1994 when he was about 1 year, laying on the side of the road, next to his dead mother at the beginning of the Rwandan genocide. The rest of her family had already been killed - she took Joseph in and raised him as her own grandson. She snuck him out of Rwanda hidden in a wooden crate, where they settled into a village and have lived ever since. When Joseph turned 15, she made him leave their village, Butega, to move to Kampala, in hopes of getting a better education and maybe a chance to succeed in running. Getting to sit in her presence and see how much she loves him was absolutely incredible. A few people and I are trying to get him a Nike sponsorship to help him finish his schooling. He is truly talented and has an amazing story to tell.

On Monday, I spent the morning at the school and said goodbye to a few of the staff members. I spent the rest of the day at Aunt Sarah's with Henry and the kids. I am going to miss that family SO much.

Tuesday was a wonderful last day! Had an hour at the slumbase and then a delicious lunch with a few of my favorite people, then spent some time in Katanga slums, trying to find the kids from Aunt Linda's apartment. We couldn't find any of them, and just as we were about to leave, Damien and Paul walked by us. I'll never forget watching Paul walk past me - with that dang smile, of course - carrying a small tree with both of his hands. We followed them home and watched Paul carefully and proudly plant the tree right outside of their home.

I ended the day visiting my friend Martina, her sister and her neice and nephew. After my final dinner, I completed the evening watching the 4th Indiana Jones movie with the boys.

It's crazy - I'm leaving a place I've called home for almost half of a year. My world has been rocked spiritually and emotionally. There's no major physical changes besides my refusal to wear makeup and the small dreadlock that has formed in my hair. But I am leaving with a changed heart. All of my comforts have been challenged. I've been broken and hurt and then built back up. I've realized that I'm not in control, and that this universe is a lot more complex than I ever knew. I've used it before, but Come Let's Dance has a popular term they use: LOVE HARD. I have learned the true definition of what this means. Loving hard is loving the people that are hardest to love in the most uncomfortable situations. It means loving until it hurts, and then loving just a little bit more. It's loving 24 hours a day, when you're tired, when you're hurt, mad, and discouraged, and when all you want is to be alone.

The relationships I have here are ones I'll have forever. The Americans and Ugandans have all impacted me in different ways and I am forever grateful for that. I have learned so much from each individual and the amount of appreciation and love I felt in this last week was outrageous.

Morg and Cody: You guys rock, seriously. I am leaving Uganda, feeling more at peace than I've ever felt and with a calming sense of tranquility. I love you both!!

I am sad to leave, but words can't describe what I'm taking away from these 4 months. Another FINAL thank you to everyone in my life. Thanks to those who supported me throughout this summer, whether you were near or from a distance. Thanks to my family for reading my thoughts on here and being constant inspiration. And thanks to Felix, for being my other half, even from the other side of the world.

I love you all and can't wait to see many of you very soon!

For the last time [for awhile atleast], I'm sending LOVE from Uganda and hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!!

Slumbasing It

The last few weeks have been filled with lots of new work and celebration. We spent 4 days in Kaliro, our village project. It was, as always, a nice escape from the city. We played soccer, did some home visits, fetched a lot of water, went on walks, hung with the kiddos, and relaxed. It was so good seeing some of the kids again and seeing familiar faces on the walks. It's unbelievable how hospitable everyone is. We went hut to hut, introducing ourselves and getting to know some of our neighbors and people dropped everything they were doing to serve us tea and nuts and give us their time.

My friend Jerry and I left the village a day earlier than everyone else because we had made plans to go to his home church on Sunday. I got to meet some of his closest friends, people he's known since primary school. Afterwards, we had a nice lunch and went to his house. I got to see where he lives and meet his sister, cousins, and niece and nephew. It was such an honor that he wanted me to meet them. He is very close with his family and he was so proud to introduce them to me.

Monday was a BIG day. In the morning, we had the graduation party for the 8 ladies who graduated from Solomon's Thread of Life Program. A little background on the project: it's a women's empowerment program in it's 3rd successful year. The goal is to temporarily get the ladies out of the slums and into an environment where they feel safe and important. We provide them and their children with a balanced lunch and daycare. It's an 8 week course where they learn basic sewing skills (child's dress, purse, skirt) and bead-making. Most of the women Solomon recruits for the class come from prostitution, abuse, or drugs. Since CLD just bought the Slumbase property, this was their first year at this property. So now, the long-term goal is to create a "Community Center" with a medical clinic, computer training center, possibly temporary housing, and much more. I wish there was room on this blog to post before and after pictures because the transformation was INCREDIBLE! But you can imagine, it was a deserted property that hadn't been properly maintained in a long time.

When we drove into the compound, I'm not sure why but I was expecting the worst. Like since the week before when I was there, someone came in and ruined everything. But at that moment I got out of the car, I would have said it was one of the most beautiful places in all of Uganda. Solomon had music playing, all the women's kids were running around, the flowers and trees we planted looked like they'd grown in just days. It was amazing. We had a small ceremony, the ladies gave appreciation speeches and talked about their plans for the future. Most of them never thought they would get the chance to actually plan for their future. They were all so proud of their new skills. 3 of them will remain at T.O.L., making crafts for local and American markets. A few of them already found jobs at craft markets around the city, and Solomon is working with the rest to make sure they find work. The ladies made us a huge local lunch and everyone hung outside for the afternoon.

Cody and Morgan in the NEW Medical Clinic

Eddy, one of the graduate's boys

The graduating class with friends and family

Cutting the cake!

Me and Solomon

Craft room mural

Sewing room mural

After the T.O.L. celebration, we hurried home to prepare for the Staff Appreciation/End of Summer Party. We had about 40 people over for dinner and cake. It was a good time to see friends I've had since May as well as lots of new faces. By the end of the day, we were exhausted and ready for bed.

After a full day of celebration, appreciation, and love, our community was devastatingly reminded how precious life really is. Our local church took about 200 young teens on a retreat to Lake Victoria. 4 of the young kids drowned in the lake on the first afternoon. Words can't explain what a tragedy this is and WHY it happened. May prayers and thoughts please be with all the families and with the church in this difficult time.

Wednesday was the official last day of Term 2 at our school. Amidst the tragedy, we decided  continue the celebration of a successful term completion with a Parent's Day and more cake! The mom's of those 6 kids who I've fallen madly in love with (the ones from Aunt Linda's apartment) were all there to take them home to Katanga for the 3 week holiday before term 3 begins. Even Rose, (Paul and Damien's mom) although she was drunk, was there. On Monday, we're going to Katanga to check-up on all of them and see them in their homes.


I've surpassed the 1-week countdown for my date of departure. It's hard to think about leaving because I don't think it's possible to reach a point when I'll actually be ready to leave this place. But I am doing everything I can in these last days. I'm visiting 2 of my friend's villages this weekend and saying bye to everyone over the course of the next week.

I hope everyone is having a happy week!